Number 6: People not reaffirming their sense of importance.
Narcissists are people who have a strong sense of their importance. They need to be regularly reaffirmed in that sense of importance or they will feel sad or worthless. Not reaffirming their importance can take the form of not reacting or saying anything back when they share their accomplishments or achievements. Narcissists love to be reminded of how important they are. They might try to get this affirmation from other people; friends, family members, and co-workers.
Narcissists need to be validated by others and they will go to Great Lengths to get that. Complimenting them and asking for their advice and opinions can make them feel like the most crucial person in the room. You can also tell them how much you appreciate their advice or input on things, and ask them questions that show you want to hear what they have to say.
Number 7: Having to confront their insecurity and inadequacy.
Narcissists live in an idealized world, where they’re always the best and most loved. They can become highly uncomfortable when pushed to confront their insecurity and inadequacy. They’ll do everything in their power to avoid it; they’ll lash out at you or avoid discussing the issue. Suppose you ever catch a narcissist off guard with a question about their flaws. In that case, they’ll probably try to get away from you as quickly as possible or pretend they don’t know what you’re talking about.
Recommended: Healing from Hidden Abuse: A Journey Through the Stages of Recovery from Psychological Abuse.
It can be challenging for narcissists to accept that they have made mistakes or aren’t perfect. They may feel insecure or embarrassed about certain things in their lives or their pasts. Still, they don’t want to talk about those things because it would mean admitting they’re not perfect. So instead of dealing with those things directly, they project them unto others and blame others for their mistakes and failures.
Number 8: Hearing nasty rumors about themselves.
Narcissists are always worried about what other people think of them. They are very sensitive to nasty rumors and gossip about themselves. They’re constantly trying to ensure that their image is just right and that everyone thinks they’re perfect.
When a narcissist hears people talking about them negatively behind their backs, it can devastate them. Most of the time, that lousy rumor might even be true. But even if it’s not, the narcissist will still internalize it as accurate, then they’ll feel wrong about what other people think of them.
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