Number 1: I’ve never felt this way about anyone before.
One common phrase the narcissist may use at the beginning of a relationship is: “I’ve never felt this way about anyone before.” Similar phrases are: “You’re special.” “This relationship feels different than anything I’ve ever felt.” “I feel a special connection to you.” “We have a special connection.” “You’re the only person that truly gets me.” “You’re my soul mate.”
At the beginning of the relationship, the narcissists may truly believe that you’re special. They may believe that they finally found someone who’s perfect, someone who’s not going to disappoint them this time; the person of their dreams. Narcissists lack whole object relation, which is the ability to understand that a person can have both good and bad qualities but still be a good person.
To a narcissist, people are either all good or they’re all bad, and at this point in the relationship, you’re all good. They can no longer recall when they felt this special connection with the person before you because they have since realized that that person was not perfect. At some point, they realized that that person was human with faults and imperfections. This is the same thing they will eventually realize about you.
In addition to saying this phrase when they truly believe that you’re special, they’ll also use this phrase when their intentions are not pure because they want to trick you into believing that you’re special. In these cases, you usually have something that benefits them in some way. When someone tells you they’ve never felt this way about anyone before, it naturally makes you feel special, like you brought something to the relationship they’ve never experienced before. You’ll feel like you’re on cloud 9.
This phrase is designed to put you on a pedestal, which then causes you to drop your guard. It makes you believe that you and the connection that you share are more important in the narcissist’s life than it truly is.
Continue reading on the next page
Sharing is caring!
