Number 5: “We have so much in common.”
The last phrase we’ll discuss that the narcissists may use at the beginning of the relationship is: “We have so much in common.” Similar phrases are: “Wow, I like that too.” “We’re just alike.” “I was going to say that too, you read my mind.” “We think just alike.” “We’re always on the same page.” The narcissists will say these phrases early in the relationship to demonstrate how compatible you are. They’ll pay very close attention to your likes and dislikes, then mirror your likes, being sure to point out these manufactured similarities to make it appear like you have more in common than you truly do.
This will make the relationship seem like a no-brainer. Most people are more comfortable in relationships with partners who have similar interests. This will make you feel like you finally found someone who gets you. You’ll feel like you won’t have to work as hard or compromise as much because you’re already so much alike. It will have you looking forward to the future. This is designed to move the relationship along at an accelerated pace, because of your strong compatibility, you will naturally want to move the relationship forward.
A Book: Why Does He Do That?: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men.
Ultimately, the narcissist uses these phrases in new relationships to make you feel special by putting you on a pedestal. Make you strive harder to make the relationship work because you don’t want to disappoint them like their ex did. Make you feel like you’re valued by being an important and vital part of the narcissist’s life. Make you feel like everything is happening so quickly, you must be destined to be together. And lastly, make you feel like because you have so much in common, that you can quickly move forward because of the connection that was already there.
Now that you understand what has happened, you have to continue to move forward and to continue to educate yourself about narcissism. This will not only help you heal, but it will help you see the warning signs in other relationships moving forward.
Read More: 10 Secrets Narcissists Keep from You.
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