7 Texting Narcissists Red Flags

Sign 3: They Never Ask Questions About You.

If you’re texting with someone new and they show no curiosity about who you are, they’re not interested. Maybe they’re texting in hopes of it leading to something physical—but they’re not trying to get to know you.

Think about it: when you want to get to know someone, you ask questions. “Where did you grow up?” “What school did you go to?” “What’s your favorite food?” “What kind of music do you listen to?” “Do you have any hobbies?”

That’s how you learn about a person—by asking. One of my kids is going through this right now. She said, “This guy doesn’t ask me anything about myself. He said he has a dog. I asked what kind of dog, how old, what food he feeds it. But even though he knows I have a dog, he’s never asked me one thing about it—or about my job.”

That’s a red flag. You could be talking to someone who’s texting ten other people. And unless someone is really interested in you, they won’t ask direct questions about your life. And that’s okay. It doesn’t make them a narcissist—it just means they’re not your person.

Sign 4: The Conversations Are Flat.

So maybe he or she does ask you a question—but the conversation feels lifeless. There’s no color, no flavor. It’s not fun. There’s no joking, no banter. It feels like an interview.

The relationship is missing that indescribable something. That little spark. That magical sense of connection you feel when someone is truly interested in you—and when you’re interested in them too. You both feel it. It’s mutual.

But if the conversation feels robotic, like a bot could be answering your texts, that’s a bad sign.

Sign 5: They Don’t Answer Your Questions.

So you ask them, “What time do you get off work?” or “What are you doing this weekend?”—and they never answer. Not even days later. Maybe they respond to the text, but you notice they skip the question. That’s weird.

One of my daughters went through this too. She said, “I’ve asked this guy direct questions multiple times. He replies, but he never answers them.”

Not questions about marriage or commitment—just simple ones: how long he’s been single, what his weekend plans are, etc. If someone isn’t answering your questions—and it’s a consistent pattern—that’s a red flag.

Because why would someone avoid answering basic questions unless:

They don’t care?
They don’t want to get close?
They’re hiding something?

If someone wants you to know them, they’ll answer your questions. They’ll want you to feel heard, comfortable, and respected—even over text. So if they avoid questions, be careful. It’s a sign they’re not investing.

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