1. If I make you feel so frustrated, why do you keep coming back?
Sometimes the narcissist will just say: “Get out of here, Forget it, I can’t stand you.” But they can have a lot of anger, strain, and tension. And when you just think, man, they’ve just so expended all of that emotion at my expense, they never want to be around me, they keep coming back, and they keep criticizing you. Why do they do that?
And the answer is, it makes them feel superior. And then, every time you gripe, whine, and complain, it’s like that feeds them. That’s their supply. It’s like well, “You need me around to just keep you straight, and it just makes me feel like, I’m that much better.” Conflict, strain, and tension actually allow them to enter into their fake place of superiority.
2. Why is it so difficult for you to admit flaws and mistakes?
Whenever the narcissist blunders or makes mistakes, and we all do, rather than saying that I didn’t go out very well, and I miscalculated that or did I just see that in the wrong kind of light, I’m so sorry; they can’t do that. They can blame you if the mistake is so obvious that you just have to acknowledge the fact that something didn’t go right. They’ll just say, well, it was your fault, it certainly wasn’t mine.
Narcissists have such a thick wall of defensiveness around them that you will not get to know them, and admit their flaws. And talking about their mistakes is highly threatening to them because it means that they’re a regular person. It’s like, no, you’re not going to know me as a regular person.
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