9. Leaving them.
This point ties up with the previous one. Narcissistic people do not like being left or broken up with. No one likes that, of course, but while a healthy person may genuinely grieve the loss of their partner as a person with all of their unique strengths and flaws, a narcissistic person simply doesn’t like the idea of losing control by being broken up with, which once again evokes their shame and fear of losing an object- their partner- from which they can extract narcissistic supply in any shape or form.
A book: Healing from Hidden Abuse: A Journey Through the Stages of Recovery from Psychological Abuse.
10. Having their deficits publicly exposed.
Narcissists have one primary objective- to protect their hypersensitive egos. Their inflated sense of importance, egotistical behavior, impaired empathy, and grandiosity are all a part of their strategy to protect that ego.
For the narcissist, there is no greater ego-breach than being publicly humiliated by having their deficits exposed to other people. This creates a lot of psychological distress and cognitive dissonance. Even the smallest public indicators that suggest that they might not be who they want to be a high-status person, causes them to react in ways that would seem completely out of proportion for most people.
This constant fear of having their weaknesses publicly visible is the very thing that impedes their ability to learn from their mistakes and dedicate themselves to self-growth.
Read more: How to Make a Narcissist PANIC
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