when these things start happening, here is what you can do to protect yourself:
1. I say this a lot, Go no contact or limited contact, depending on kids. It’s easier to go no contact if there are no kids or financial obligations that you’re finishing up after the ending of a relationship. Because hearing the narcissist’s voice or even seeing handwriting can trigger you and make you miss the narcissist.
2 . I want you to remember the truth, and this is why I encourage you to write down all the abuse on a separate piece of paper or in a different part of your journal. I want you to definitely write down all the bad things. We tend to forget those things that hurt us, and we romanticize the few good times.
And you can go back and look at the weeks, months, years, decades of what you went through and you can say, I hung in there for all this time, and look where it got me.
3. Talkback to the narcissist’s voice in your head like, hey, the grass is always greener, maybe your lawn looks pretty green to you through your rose-colored glasses but the one I’m standing on that really you are too is pretty brown and crunchy, I’m out.
Say these things to yourself in your head. And one of the favorites that I always heard was, no one’s going to love you as I love you, when I say now to that I wish I could have said it back then, is thank the Lord because I am really looking for some true unconditional love not whatever this is.
Read more: 11 Things to Expect When the Narcissist Knows You Have Figured Them Out
4. And finally as you’re cleaning up, I don’t want to put this your healing this is all part of the healing process, leaving, going no contact, or limited contact, I want you to think about also the people around you that are either there for you or they aren’t.
So if there are toxic people that are around you, start limiting your contact with them, and you can do it with love and that, gosh, I, you know, it’d be great to see you but I just can’t make that work tonight because you will have friends that don’t stick by you and you will have friends that do.
And right now, if you’re leaving the narcissist, you need people that have your back, true friends will be there through thick and thin.
I wish you peace, and I want you to remember that you are worthy, you are loved, and you are enough.
Sharing is caring!
