Number 1: manipulation via love-bombing and/or gaslighting.
First of all, depending on the nature of the relationship, they may try to manipulate you back into the illusion of who they want you to believe they are through either love-bombing and/or gaslighting, but more often than not, the problem with this is you and they both know it’s too late. The mask has slipped once you know, you know. They know it and you know it, and they can’t unring those bells, although they may give it a shot initially.
Number 2: The triggering of deep-seated fear, shame, and insecurity.
What typically happens once they know that love bombing and gaslighting aren’t going to work with you anymore is they trigger themselves. That’s right. Not you, but they trigger their own deep-seated fear, shame, and insecurity by virtue of having slipped up and dropped the mask. And nothing terrifies the narcissist more than the threat of exposure. So this never goes well, because once their fear, shame, and insecurity have been triggered, they’re going to have to lash out and you will be blamed.
If it’s a covert narcissist you’re dealing with, they’ll be more likely to do the lashing out behind your back, sneaky spineless little cowards that they are. An overt narcissist, however, will lash out more directly, which leads me to my next point.
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