Face 3: Greed.
For a female covert narcissist, greed isn’t just about wanting more; it’s about taking more—hoarding what she has and making sure that others are left drained. This isn’t the simple selfishness of wanting a bigger slice of the pie; it’s a relentless, insatiable hunger to acquire, consume, and withhold, whether it’s time, energy, resources, or emotional investment.
What sets this greed apart is its element of avarice—a deep, almost compulsive need to acquire and isolate. She consumes affection, attention, or financial resources not to enjoy them, but to make sure that no one else benefits. This emotional sequestering isolates her relationships and creates an imbalance where everything flows towards her while nothing is given in return.
Her greed is not just destructive; it’s sadistic. She is willing to exploit and even hurt others to have her needs met, often with a voracious eagerness to devour. A covert narcissist might insist that others work, give, or sacrifice more than their fair share while presenting herself as the one who is constantly in need. Her demands are subtle but relentless, leaving those around her feeling used and undervalued.
A dead giveaway for this kind of greed is the unspoken expectation that others will always pick up the slack. She might position herself as overwhelmed, constantly struggling, or deserving of special treatment. Comments like “I don’t know how I’m going to manage this,” or even silence paired with a really pitiful look on her face, subtly pressure others into stepping up. But no matter how much is given, it’s never enough.
In romantic relationships, her greed shows up as the expectation that her partner carries the emotional and financial burdens without reciprocity. In friendships or family dynamics, she leans heavily on others, expecting that their time, energy, and resources will be at her disposal while rarely offering gratitude or support in return. Her avarice drives her to consume endlessly—attention, help, validation—without ever feeling satisfied.
What’s especially damaging is how this greed and avarice isolate those around her. Over time, the imbalance erodes trust and equality, leaving others feeling depleted and resentful.
Read More: 8 Clear Signs You’re Being Used, Not Loved.
Face 4: Vulnerability.
A female covert narcissist uses what appears to be vulnerability as a way to elicit pity. It might sound like she’s sharing something deeply personal—stories of how she feels unworthy, unloved, or mistreated—but her goal isn’t connection; it’s to make you feel responsible for her pain so you can continue providing for her emotionally, financially, or otherwise.
True vulnerability is a strength; it’s the courage to share and connect in an honest way. But this isn’t what a covert narcissist does. Her vulnerability isn’t courageous, it’s not honest, and it’s not meant for connection. It’s about reinforcing her ego and keeping others invested in meeting her needs. Her emotions might feel real; she might even cry real tears, but don’t be fooled—this isn’t grief or sadness; it’s self-pity.
The female covert narcissist uses this vulnerability tactic to secure narcissistic supply. It’s her way of maintaining her position at the top of the victim hierarchy, making sure that her suffering is always seen as greater than anyone else’s. By leveraging this dynamic, she keeps others feeling obligated to comfort, support, and prioritize her while their own needs and struggles are overshadowed.
Over time, this leaves partners, friends, and family feeling drained and guilty. They feel trapped in a cycle of constantly giving, helping, and serving, yet it’s never enough to satisfy her.
Recommended: Healing from Hidden Abuse: A Journey Through the Stages of Recovery from Psychological Abuse.
Continue reading on the next page
Sharing is caring!
