3. You’re a great listener.
Toxic people like talking about themselves: Their problems, their issues, and their life. It’s always something about them. They never run out of stuff to complain about, and you, being the good friend, are always there for them. They’re sad, right? They just need someone to listen to them, and you, being the good friend, are there for them. Well, here’s the thing about toxic people. They don’t need someone to vent or help them. They just need someone to continuously give them attention and listen to them.
A good friend doesn’t just come to you and vent and then leave. They’re there for you when you’re down too, and they try to listen to you instead of just piling their issues on you and never letting you talk. Learn to recognize people that just use you for attention.
Remember that a good friend will always understand when you’re not in the right mental space to listen. A toxic person however will shame you for not giving them attention. Learn to set boundaries. You don’t owe anyone anything, especially at the cost of your mental peace.
4. You try to help everyone.
You like helping people. AndyYou want to make everything better for your friends and you’re willing to do anything it takes for them to be happy. They’re your friends after all, right? So, what if you have to make yourself a little uncomfortable to make them happy? You don’t mind, and if it makes someone happy, who cares about a little problem. Well. No! You come first. You matter. Your mental health, your peace, it matters. Someone is making you think otherwise, then leave them.
A good friend would never be okay with you troubling yourself just to make them happy. They would never be comfortable with the happiness that comes at the cost of their friend’s mental health. Be compassionate, help people, but never at the cost of your mental health and peace, and especially if it’s someone that demands you to help them. You don’t owe anyone anything. You make your own decisions.
A BOOK: How To Kill A Narcissist: Debunking The Myth Of Narcissism And Recovering From Narcissistic Abuse
If you choose to help someone, you’re a good person, but if you choose to not help someone and prioritize your mental health, that doesn’t make you a bad person.
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