1. Negging
Negging is essentially a backhanded compliment that is said in a playful manner that is kind of akin to flirting. So the person is making you feel good and making you feel bad at the same time. Now, there are lots of ways that someone can do this. But for the most part, they’re pointing out your flaws. It can come across as harmless, but things can really escalate from here. If someone’s comfortable insulting you to your face this early, it’s really not a good sign. And I’ll add that it’s an especially bad sign if they can insult you but they can’t take it in return.
2. One-sided conversation.
The second sign that you might be texting a narcissist is the one-sided conversation. And this is going to be consistent throughout your relationship with this person. And this happens because a narcissist really only has so much of an attention span for someone else’s stuff. If it doesn’t have anything to do with a narcissist, they’re going to back out really quick, and they might even be rude about it. So for example, they might ask you about your day because they know that that’s something that people should do, right? If you’re interested in someone, you should be interested in what goes on in their life. But if you take too long to explain something or if you go into too much detail, they might rudely tell you that they didn’t ask for all that; they were just wondering if it was good or bad.
A Book: Why Does He Do That?: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men.
And at the same time, they’re going to share everything about their lives; they’re going to unload on you but not accept when you have something to say that doesn’t involve them. It’s going to be a very one-sided conversation that is really all about the other person. And this can be a little bit tricky for people who are a little bit insecure or maybe people-pleasing type people, because you don’t love to have the focus on you, right? So if someone else is taking that spotlight, you might feel more comfortable. But pay attention to how they respond when you do have something to say. If they’re shutting you down, it is a major red flag.
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