Number 3: Boost your self-esteem.
Narcissistic people have a tendency to pick romantic partners, employees, or parts of the family that are or appear to be the weakest link. They pick people who have lower self-esteem and experience self-doubt so that they will end up completely relying on the abuser to help them function in life. They will come to the abuser when they look for advice on big financial or career decisions.
The victims believe that their abuser is looking out for them and their constant criticism is them being helpful. What victims have to see is that loved ones are not there to constantly criticize but to offer encouragement and advice. One way to build an immunity to constant belittling is to realize your own self-worth and increase your self-esteem. Developing your self-esteem does not always mean your outside appearance, but the confidence in your choices.
Repeatedly tell yourself that you will make the right choices to suit your needs. The abuser cannot control something that is already controlled by someone else. Once the victim starts to see the narcissistic traits in someone and their attempt to control, they can step back from the situation and evaluate what the abuser has been controlling and what they need to fix.
Number 4: Telling them No.
This may seem like a small word and we say it so much, but to a narcissist, this word is big. Narcissistic people are not used to rejection and the word has a big impact on the way they function. The key to telling a narcissist no is making sure you’re firm but respectful. The tone the victim uses and their body language have a lot to do with the abuser’s reaction. The victim will always want to seem like their mind’s made up and they cannot be persuaded, but also tell them that they have heard them and they do respect what they have to say.
Persistence is key to winning the battle, and it will help the victim become confident that they can overcome these hard times. A victim who stands their ground will have to prepare for and overcome the consequences that sometimes go with saying No. Many times, there is name-calling, criticism, bullying, and attempts to change the victim’s mind. They are looking for flexibility in a victim, not firmness.
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