Number 1: “I’ve never met anyone like you before.”
Now, this is the kind of thing that a narcissist will say to you early on when they’re quite literally love-bombing you, and they do this with the intent to get you hooked and fast. And of course, there can be times when we meet someone and feel a deep connection right away, but in most cases, a real healthy connection is something that takes time to develop. So, for sure, it’s possible that you’ll meet someone who immediately feels a genuine sense of admiration and respect for you and wants to express that, but that’s not what’s going on when a narcissist prematurely declares their intense feelings or undying love for you.
The narcissist doesn’t actually have a genuine sense of admiration or respect for anyone. Rather, the narcissist only sees the reflected projection of their false persona initially, which quickly transitions to the reflected projection of their disowned shadow, and that’s when things start going sideways. In order for the narcissist to hook you as a captive audience and a reliable source of narcissistic supply, you’ll likely hear the words, “I love you,” very quickly. And the bottom line is this, premature declarations of intense feelings or love for that matter, and moving way too quickly in the early stages of a relationship, any relationship, are big red flags.
So, don’t be flattered by any of this, especially if you have a history of attracting empathy-impaired and highly manipulative partners. You’ll want to pace yourself and take your time getting to know who you’re dealing with before you allow yourself to be swept up in what could end in another disaster. It takes time to get to know people, so take your time and pay attention while you’re at it.
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