3. They Claim Everything Is Luck.
Now, while people with low self-esteem love to claim responsibility for everything bad that happens, they never take credit for the good. They’ll never acknowledge their hard work or all the effort they put into making something happen and will just tie it to luck or chance. You made it into the school of your choice or got the job you always wanted. This is because of your hard work, persistence, determination, and intelligence. Sure, luck may have played a part in it, but mostly, it was because of your efforts.
People with low self-esteem believe that they’re not good enough and the only reason they achieve something is because of sheer luck. They don’t deserve this victory and it wasn’t because of all the struggles they had overcome to get it.
According to the self-esteem institute, these are called irrational or dishonest self-statements. You need to believe in yourself more. Believe in the person that worked so hard and got where they are today. Acknowledge your hard work and celebrate your achievements. You deserve it. You worked for it. Now it’s time for you to own your success.
A Book: Healing from Hidden Abuse: A Journey Through the Stages of Recovery from Psychological Abuse.
4. They Let Others Affect Their Decisions.
If you go out to buy a dress or a suit, do you buy one that you think others will like and approve of, or do you get something that you like and want? When it’s time to choose your major or decide your job, do you pick one that you’re interested in and like or do you go for something that you know your parents or friends will approve of? If you’re letting other people make your decisions for you and letting their approval be the driving factor behind what you decide, then chances are you have low self-esteem.
People with low self-esteem are always looking for validation, and since they believe that they can’t make the right decision by themselves, they rely on others to make their decisions for them. They also tend to compare themselves with other people and do what they’re doing so they can feel approved.
This is super bad for your mental well-being, and what you need to do is stop comparing yourself to others. Columbia university’s “Go Ask Alice,” Said: If you can’t control comparing yourself to others, how about focusing on your similarities with others?
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