2. Radical acceptance!
I believe that it is necessary to implement a strategy known as and called radical acceptance. Radical acceptance is based on the notion that suffering comes not directly from pain, but from one’s attachment to the pain. Radical acceptance has its roots in Buddhism and is defined as the ability to accept situations that are outside of your control, without judging them, which in turn reduces suffering.
Basically, it suggests that non-attachment is the key to overcoming suffering. It doesn’t mean approving what happened. It simply means accepting reality for what it is and not getting caught up in the emotional reaction to reality. What has happened has happened. And no matter how badly, we wish we could go back in time, no matter how wrong and horrible it is that the narcissist did this to us, no matter what should have happened, it didn’t.
And if we get caught up and stuck in what should have happened, we are going to suffer even more and longer than we already have. Radical acceptance is accepting the reality of what has happened so that we can move on. We cannot control what has happened. The best we can do is accept it, try, and learn from it, and heal.
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