4. Smear campaign
Narcissists don’t go quietly. So they’re gonna smear campaign you, and then they’re gonna tell everybody and they’re gonna game-play you. They’re gonna do everything they can to really impact your life in a negative way most of the time.
They will abuse you to the point where psychological wounds become increasingly serious. It’s common. And sometimes it’s worse. Sometimes they go so far as to physically abuse you, where they didn’t before.
So be aware of this and keep yourself safe. Don’t be afraid to call the police if they show up at your house in the middle of the night or something.
A book: Divorcing A Narcissist And Other Jerks
5. Narcissists are all about winning.
They don’t care if your kids are negatively affected. And they don’t care if they lose everything in the process. They just want to win the relationship. They need to be validated, they need to be proven right. They’ll fight you for custody, even if they don’t want the kids. They will try to keep the house, even if they know they don’t want the house. They’re just gonna move out of it, or they’re gonna sell it.
The truth of what really happened between the two of you will only come out of your mouth if it comes out of anyone. Because the narcissist cannot ever even admit the truth to him or herself. You have to remember, narcissists have no empathy.
So they don’t care how they’re making you feel, and above all, they just want to win. And as always, they don’t give a crap about the consequences of their own behavior because they don’t accept responsibility. Narcissists are gonna do their very best to make you play the game with them.
6. Narcissists want to keep playing the game and they’re gonna do everything they can to just suck you into it.
It does not matter how the break-up happened. And it doesn’t matter where the divorce came from. It doesn’t matter if they literally left you for another person or if you literally walked in on them having sex with your best friend on your bed in your house. It doesn’t matter because they will be like: ” I’m the victim.”
They will walk around telling everyone as I said in number 3 – smear campaigning, that’s how they roll. They will say things to you like, why are you doing this to me? And inevitably, you will be the one wearing the big red blame sticker.
Of course, any time you try to address any issues, you think to yourself: okay, well, maybe we can work it out, maybe they understand now. You try to address those issues and the narcissist inevitably will flip it all back around.
As soon as they begin to feel uncomfortable, they start pointing out things that are wrong with you. You become the problem. And then, they say things to you like: well, I’ll do that if you promise that you will never, ever again leave trash in the kitchen or whatever. They start picking at tiny things and pulling you apart and looking for ways to make it about them being the victim and not you.
And they’re flying monkeys sometimes, especially those willing flying monkeys, will come in with them on this and play this game. This is seen a lot of times with a narcissistic mother. When a narcissistic mother has a golden child and the golden child gets married and is a narcissist. This type of dynamic is often seen with the two of them ganging up on the victim or the supply during the divorce.
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