When should I start Dating after a Toxic Relationship?


2. Values on Daily Basis.

Let me give you a good example of a value that’s very important to me, and I’m not sure if it is to you, but it gives you an example. The example is independence. I value independence. Independence is one of the most important values that I have in my life. Independence is the independence of thought, independence of feeling, and independence of action. That’s a huge value to me.

 Independent thought means that somebody’s not going to tell me how to think or make fun of how I think. That’s something that goes against my values altogether, that’s a boundary. Independence of action means that I’m allowed to do what I want to do. Now I’m not going crazy or going partying, but I’m married but I’m still allowed to work as much as I need to work. if I want to go to the gym or do what I want to do or see some friends that’s okay because I’m allowed to do that because I’ve created that independent action where it’s not based on what other people want me to do.

 Independence of feelings means that I’m allowed to feel a certain way. I’m allowed to express my feelings in a safe environment, where I’m not ridiculed, where I’m not questioned, and where I’m not gaslighted by my feelings and how I’m speaking, and I’m not always talking about how I feel. When I do express my feelings, I’m in an environment with people that maybe agree or disagree with, but they still respect the fact that I’m able to express my feelings.

A book: Healing from Hidden Abuse: A Journey Through the Stages of Recovery from Psychological Abuse.

 It’s not in an environment where I feel like I have to walk on eggshells. It’s not in an environment where I feel like I have to hide my feelings. And it’s not in an environment where it’s toxic, where when I bring up my feelings I get accosted or ridiculed. So that’s a really good example of value. I have a value that I live my life by.

Continue reading on the next page


Sharing is caring!