Number 5: Confession through projection.
In spite of the insanity of their own behavior and their own toxic and abusive ways, you’ll become the big bad villain to their victim, no matter how much they have to lie and deny to make it so. Suddenly, you’re the fake, the fraud, the bully, the liar, the manipulator, the one who needs psychological help, or the one who can’t be trusted around children, while they continue to enable and protect themselves and others who are causing all manner of damage and destruction.
For example, the toxic grandparent who singles out and bullies one of the grandchildren or worse yet, the family pedophile who has the benefit of being protected, and therefore, fully enabled. And you’re the bad guy because you happen to notice or finally found the courage to stand up and speak the truth. Sick stuff! But this is what it is when you’re dealing with people who land on the spectrum of destructive narcissism.
Number 6: Rageful retaliation.
Once the narcissist knows they have zero control over you, your perceptions, and in particular, your perception of them, in other words, you can’t be fooled anymore, they’ll go for maximum damage. They will create as much chaos as possible. They’ll cause as much pain, drama, trauma, and devastation as they possibly can on their way out. They rarely exit a relationship dynamic, any relationship dynamic quietly, especially if they’re not the ones closing the door on the relationship.
And based on both personal and professional experience, I can tell you that the reason for this is in their mind by taking it to the next level, they now get to blame you for the dramatic fallout and how badly things ended. They’ll crank up the volume to maximum intensity, spewing all manner of abuse and insanity, and then tell everyone just how terrible you are.
After all, you have a lot of nerve seeing them for who they are, you have a lot of nerves seeing their behavior for what it is, how dare you. Don’t you know who the narcissist thinks they are; the nerve of you for having reasonable standards limits and boundaries? The nerve of you for not being willing to stand still in a toxic environment with toxic people pretending all manner of manipulation, dysfunction, and abuse isn’t taking place, the nerve. Imagine.
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